The Stink/Transcript

A Lesson in Recycling

[Episode starts in a dramatic setting as Gumball reaches for a glowing blue crystal and epic music plays. He is about to grab it when a voice is heard]

Darwin: Gumball!! Think about what you're doing!

Gumball: I have... to save... the planet!!

Darwin: Yes, but you're supposed to rinse it out and peel off the label first!

Gumball: Ugh.

[Scene transitions to reality; they are standing by some recycling bins in front of a store, and the diamond has turned into a bottle]

Gumball: Why do they have to make recycling so complicated?

Darwin: Dude, any time you recycle anything, you act as if you're single-handedly saving the world.

Gumball: Ugh, I'll just throw it in the regular trash. It's easier to carry the guilt than to carry the bottle.

[Right as Gumball nonchalantly throws the bottle over his shoulder, Mr. Small swiftly bursts out from the store doors]

Mister Small​​​​​: [In slow-motion] Nooooo!

[He does a slow-mo diving save for the bottle, but it hits him square in the stomach with a "honk" sound. Back to normal speed as he flops to the ground]

Mister Small​​​​​: I misjudged! [Gets up, handing Gumball the bottle] You have to recycle this!

Gumball: Ugh, but I never know which bin to use.

[Pan on all the recycling bins with increasingly bizarre names: Paper, Plastic, Cards, Greetings Cards, Cardboard, Board Games, Storyboards, Metal, Heavy Metal, Thrash Metal, Rock, Soft Rock, Soft Toys, Bees]

Mister Small​​​​​: Then you need to learn more about recycling. Take a leaf from my book. Well, don't actually take a leaf, 'cuz that would harm the tree that the book was made from. Actually, don't make a book at all, because the trees are dying! Just—use recycled paper, okay?

Gumball: Who wants to use something that's already been used? Isn't it weird making new stuff out of old stuff?

[A shot of Mr. Small's season one design appears. As he says his next line, a two-second clip of him talking is continuously looped]

Mister Small​​​​​: With today's sophisticated recycling techniques, you can reuse old stuff and most people can never tell the difference. [Back to normal]

Gumball: Nah, I think it just looks cheap.

Mister Small​​​​​: All I'm saying is, we all need to be aware of the impact we're having on the planet. Look at me. I have so little impact that when I'm gone, it'll be like I never even existed! Doesn't that sound fulfilling?

Gumball: No! If we ruin this planet, can't we just move on to the next one? It's what the founding fathers would have done.

Mister Small​​​​​: It's exactly that kind of glib attitude that led to the near-extinction of the great Stink Ape of Elmore Woods. [Close-up on a painting of the Stink Ape on the side of Janice]

Gumball: Wow. That ape must've been seriously glib for it to lead to its own extinction.

Mister Small​​​​​: I will make this as clear as I possibly can. The people were glib; the ape was not glib.

Gumball: How do you know the ape wasn't glib?

Darwin: I guess everyone has a bad day sometimes.

Mister Small​​​​​: Right. I-I-I feel like we're getting away from the point.

Gumball: That's true. I don't even know what glib means. Uh—why is this Bigfoot-creature thing called the Stink Ape anyway?

Mister Small​​​​​: Its scent was reminiscent of a skunk. Or rotting flesh. Or rotting skunk flesh.

Gumball: And just to confirm, you wanna save this animal, not destroy it with fire? Wait— [sniffs] I can definitely smell something! Can you smell it, Darwin?

Darwin: [sniffs] It smells like miscellaneous herbs and body odor.

Gumball: Uh, I was going for THE STINK OF HYPOCRISY!!! [points accusingly at Mr. Small]

Mister Small​​​​​: Excuse me!

Gumball: Well, everything you do has an impact on something.

Mister Small​​​​​: Not me! Come, walk a mile in my sandals, I'll show you. [walks off]

Gumball: I don't think those things can last a mile, but whatever. [They follow him]

I've Never Harmed a Single Living Thing!

[Scene cuts to Gumball, Darwin, and Mr. Small walking into Organic 'n' Stuff, a small hipster-style grocery store. Larry greets them at the counter]

Larry: Welcome to Organic 'n' Stuff!

Mister Small​​​​​: [to Gumball and Darwin] I think all ethical living has to start with what you buy. Which is why I never buy from big corporations. I shop at thirteen different free trade, independent grocery stores like this one. [picks up a basket and starts filling it] Sure, it may take me roughly three tanks of gas and a full set of tires to get me my groceries, but all the food here is locally sourced.

Gumball: Really? Were the coconuts locally sourced? And the Hungarian goulash? And this Himalayan goat curd? How did that get here? [hands a tub of goat curd to Darwin]

Darwin: [reading back of container] Truck, truck, boat, train, plane, truck, tanker, moped, truck, unicycle.

Mister Small​​​​​: Well, it was locally sourced in its country of origin. [Takes his basket to the checkout] Thanks, Larry. Hey, am I paying extra for this warm feeling inside?

Larry: Ha ha! Yes. [Mr. Small hands him a bill and as Larry puts it into the register, he keeps his hand outstretched, eagerly awaiting change. Larry just looks at him, annoyed. Mr. Small sighs glumly and leaves.]

[Outside the store]

Gumball: But Mr. Small, how can you justify having money? It's made from paper, which comes from trees, which need to be cut down.

Mister Small​​​​​: But—I also use a bank card.

Gumball: A plastic bank card, perchance?

Mister Small​​​​​: FINE!! [throws his bank card on the ground]

Gumball: Littering, Mr. Small? Really?

Mister Small​​​​​: Ugh. [walks off]

[Scene cuts next to Gumball, Darwin, and Mr. Small walking into Tea 'n' Stuff, a hipster coffee and tea shop that looks suspiciously similar to Organic 'n' Stuff. Larry greets them once again at the counter]

Larry: Welcome to Tea 'n' Stuff! What kind of blend are you vibing today?

Mister Small​​​​​: Yeah, yeah, yeah, just my usual.

Gumball: [looks around suspiciously] Haven't we already been in here?

Larry: [nervously] Ha-ha, no. Tea 'n' Stuff is not connected to Organic 'n' Stuff, and neither of them are affiliates or subsidiaries of Chanax Incorporated.

Gumball: Are you sure about that?

Mister Small​​​​​: Of course. They do poetry readings and jazz nights. There's a chalkboard with inspirational messages on it. [The chalkboard on the wall is shown to say "Coffee Helps make A Normal Afternoon Xtra-special"] It can't be a big corporation.

Gumball: Look closer, Mr. Small.

[Sure enough, the Chanax name is hidden everywhere in the store: on a poster, in the initial letters on the chalkboard, even on a tattoo on Larry's arm. He covers his arm sheepishly]

Mister Small​​​​​: Fine! Then I'll just drink tap water! [takes a paper cup, fills it with water from the water cooler and takes a big sip]

Gumball: Just accept it. Everyone has an impact on something.

Mister Small​​​​​: Well, not me! I have never harmed a single living thing! [Walks out holding the cup]

Larry: Hey, he hasn't paid!

Gumball: But it says the water's complimentary.

Larry: Yes, but the paper cup is thirteen fifty.

Living In the Forest

[Mr. Small drives away from the store]

Mister Small​​​​​: [in his head] I've never harmed a single living thing! I've never harmed a single living thing! [suddenly out loud] I've never harmed a single living thing! [smugly] Wow. I really nailed that line. But—maybe he's right. [Looks into his water cup. A microscope image of four microbes is seen.]

Young Microbe: I'm home!

Microbe Dog: [barks]

Young Microbe: Oh hey, Patch! Hey, buddy! Mom, Dad, I've got some news! I got into Yale! For microbes.

Microbe Mom: Oh, we're so proud of you!

Microbe Dad: A chip off the old cell lining. Twenty-four generations of our family have lived in this water for almost an hour and you'll be the first to go to university, son!

[Suddenly, they are all swept away by a wave, screaming. It is revealed to be Mr. Small drinking the water. Back to reality]

Mister Small​​​​​: What have I done?! [A fly lands on his windshield]

Fly: What did I ever do to you?!

Mister Small​​​​​: I'm so sorry! Let me just- [Turns on his windshield wipers to free the fly, but only ends up squishing him more. Mr. Small screams and veers off the road, bumping into a tree. A branch bends downward. He looks up and from his perspective, it looks like the tree is pointing at him accusingly, with a face and all. He screams again and runs off into the wilderness]

Mister Small​​​​​: AAAHHHHH!! I'M A MONSTER!!! [Hears some annoyed-sounding animal noises] Sorry. Sorry. Sorry!

[Later, in a sun-filled forest clearing.]

Mister Small​​​​​: Ah. Maybe this is meant to be. I am meant to be completely at one with nature! EMBRACE ME, EARTH MOTHER!!! [Out of nowhere, it starts to downpour] Or don't. I guess you wanna be more of an earth aunt who only calls once a year.

[A few days later. It's a beautiful day in the forest, but Mr. Small is exhausted, hungry, and covered in dirt and twigs. He finds a squirrel, who mimes to him that he is hungry.]

Mister Small​​​​​: Hungry? Yeah, I am hungry. Lead on, little buddy.

[The squirrel hops off, and Mr. Small crawls after him. They arrive at a small clearing, where a hungry horde of squirrels awaits. They all ravenously attack him and start biting.]

Mister Small​​​​​: AAHH! AAAAAHHHH!! He meant he was hungry!

[Mr. Small is now walking through a river. He lifts up his leg and finds a leech]

Mister Small​​​​​: AAHH! A LEECH!! Well, take what you need, I've got more than enough. [The leech sucks him completely dry.] A little too much! [He squeezes the leech and returns to normal, then pulls it off and throws it away.]

[Some time later, Mr. Small is meditating and some butterflies land on him.]

Mister Small​​​​​: Ah, beautiful. Not all nature is out to get me. [More butterflies land on him and start lifting him up.] Huh? [They slowly lift him into the mouth of a giant leech.] AHHHH! [The worm starts to swallow him.]

The Pain of Guilt

[Meanwhile, at Elmore Junior High in Miss Simian's classroom]

Nigel Brown: Now class, it seems Mr. Small has taken a leave of absence. And his senses... so I'll be taking his class today.

Darwin: Do you feel bad about Mr. Small?

Gumball: No, I mean he's always struck me as the type of guy who would eventually throw his life away and go live in the woods. I don’t think it has anything to with me. My conscience is clear.

[Enters Gumball's conscience, with different Gumballs trying to put up with the guilt]

Other Gumball 1: [Russian accent] Captain, what is wrong?

Gumball: Nothing's wrong. Put up the denial shields.

Other Gumball 1: They're already at maximum! They won't take any more.

Other Gumball 2: Captain, we appear to be running low on soda on one of the vending machines on level three.

Gumball: Why would you tell me that now?

Other Gumball 2: Well, excuse me for wanting to be a part of something.

Other Gumball 1: The denial shields are down! Facts are getting in!

Gumball: Prepare for emotional impact.

[Back to Miss Simian’s classroom]

Gumball: Yeah, you’re right, I feel super guilty. And the ship's out of soda.

Darwin: Huh?

Gumball: Nothing. Look, we gotta see if he’s okay. I mean, it’s probably too late, but maybe we can help identify him.

Finding Mister Small

[Nighttime. Gumball and Darwin are out in Elmore Woods.]

Gumball: MISTER SMALL!!! MISTER SMALL!!!

Darwin: Dude, don't shout! There could be anything out here. You'll make us a target!

Gumball: Good point. I'll do a different voice. That way whatever comes won't know it's us! [sing-songy] Mister Sma-all!! Mister Sma-AAAAAHHHH!!

[They fall into a hole and land in front of a cave. Heavy breathing is heard from inside the cave.]

Gumball: Uh- you okay? [Darwin nods and moves his mouth with the breathing noises] Dude, you need to get some exercise. You sound like a French bulldog in a sauna.

Darwin: That's not me. And... [sniffs] Can you smell something?

Gumball: [sniffs] Yeah, it kinda smells like rotting flesh!

Darwin: Or a skunk!

Gumball and Darwin: OR ROTTING SKUNK FLESH!!

[Two bright red eyes open from inside the cave. The two turn around in fear.]

Darwin: [whimpering] It's the ape!

Gumball: On three. One, two, three...[Darwin runs away] STAY PERFECTLY STILL!! [He notices this and catches up with Darwin.] Why did you run?!

Darwin: You counted down! Who does a countdown to nothing?!

Gumball: Lonely people on New Year's Eve?

Darwin: Yeah. Fair point. [They speed up.] IT'S COMING!!! [A shadowy figure walks towards them.]

Gumball: [sees a log on the path] Quick! In here!! [They crawl in, but the figure keeps coming closer.]

Darwin: It's right outside! What do we do?!

Gumball: We're gonna roll this thing! [He pushes on the side of the log, and it rolls down a cliff. They land, but with swapped limbs.] Maybe one more roll?

Darwin: Yeah. [They keep rolling, and hit the side of a rock, back to normal.]

Gumball: Ah, that's better. Okay, the coast is cle-AAAAHHHH!!! [The figure's hand blocks the side of the log, and his leg blocks the other side. He punches into the top, but his arm gets stuck.] Its arm is stuck! Go, go, go!!! [They crawl under his arm, get out of the log, and suddenly find themselves cornered by the figure.] This is it. It's all over.

[Darwin reaches out his hand, and Gumball takes it. He quickly pulls back.]

Darwin: Ugh! Your hands are really sweaty!

Gumball: Yeah, I know, I'm sorry about that, but I didn't want to leave you hanging. And I didn't have time to wipe.

[The shadow gets closer. The boys grab each other.]

Gumball and Darwin: DAAAAAHHHHH!!!!

[The light comes on the shadowy figure. It's none other than Mr. Small, battered and filthy.]

Mister Small​​​​​: Boys! I'm so glad you're okay!

Darwin: Mr. Small!!

Gumball: Why were you chasing us?

Mister Small​​​​​: I was trying to warn you! These woods are not safe! Trust me. These have been the hardest eight months of my life!

Gumball: You've been gone half a day.

Mister Small​​​​​: I figured I would not survive another winter. [His eye twitches]

Darwin: But on the plus side, you're living at one with nature.

Mister Small​​​​​: And it's all thanks to you! [Gives Gumball and Darwin a big hug. Gumball's face dries up in disgust.]

Gumball: It seems you've buried the stink of hypocrisy under a far worse smell.

Darwin: We thought you were the Stink Ape!

Mister Small​​​​​: Ho-ho! I'm afraid it doesn't exist. I've been out here long enough to know that there's no such thing.

Darwin: But if there's no Stink Ape, what's so dangerous about the woods?

Mister Small​​​​​: Oh, I've set traps everywhere.

Gumball: Wait, traps? You're a vegetarian. What happened to living on nuts and berries?

Mister Small​​​​​: Turns out there's competition for the nuts and berries. And...turns out the competition is tastier than the nuts and berries.

Gumball: Okay, but if there's no Stink Ape....what's that?

[Another shadowy figure walks towards them. Glowing mushrooms grow on the ground where it steps.]

Mister Small​​​​​: Oh my goodness! It's real! [The light comes on him. Sure enough, it's the real Stink Ape.] It's come to greet me as a brother of the forest! Embrace me, noble creature- [The ape falls into a deep hole. Mr. Small gasps.]

Darwin: Will it be okay?

Mister Small​​​​​: I don't know. This is one of my more brutal traps.

Gumball: Eh, it's just a hole. I guess he'll- [Darts fly into the hole, and a huge boulder falls on top. The ape lets out a muffled groan.]

Mister Small​​​​​: I think I was doing less damage in the real world.

Gumball: Uh, see you back at school tomorrow?

Mister Small​​​​​: Yeah. [Episode ends.]

v • e Transcript

Episode 1 The DVD	Episode 2 The Responsible	Episode 3 The Third	Episode 4 The Debt
Episode 5 The End	Episode 6 The Dress	Episode 7 The Quest	Episode 8 The Spoon
Episode 9 The Pressure	Episode 10 The Painting	Episode 11 The Laziest	Episode 12 The Ghost
Episode 13 The Mystery	Episode 14 The Prank	Episode 15 The Gi	Episode 16 The Kiss
Episode 17 The Party	Episode 18 The Refund	Episode 19 The Robot	Episode 20 The Picnic
Episode 21 The Goons	Episode 22 The Secret	Episode 23 The Sock	Episode 24 The Genius
Episode 25 The Poltergeist	Episode 26 The Mustache	Episode 27 The Date	Episode 28 The Club
Episode 29 The Wand	Episode 30 The Ape	Episode 31 The Car	Episode 32 The Curse
Episode 33 The Microwave	Episode 34 The Meddler	Episode 35 The Helmet	Episode 36 The Fight

Episode 1 The Remote	Episode 2 The Colossus	Episode 3 The Knights	Episode 4 The Fridge
Episode 5 The Flower	Episode 6 The Banana	Episode 7 The Phone	Episode 8 The Job
Episode 9 Halloween	Episode 10 The Treasure	Episode 11 The Apology	Episode 12 The Words
Episode 13 The Skull	Episode 14 The Bet	Episode 15 Christmas	Episode 16 The Watch
Episode 17 The Bumpkin	Episode 18 The Flakers	Episode 19 The Authority	Episode 20 The Virus
Episode 21 The Pony	Episode 22 The Hero	Episode 23 The Dream	Episode 24 The Sidekick
Episode 25 The Photo	Episode 26 The Tag	Episode 27 The Storm	Episode 28 The Lesson
Episode 29 The Game	Episode 30 The Limit	Episode 31 The Voice	Episode 32 The Promise
Episode 33 The Castle	Episode 34 The Boombox	Episode 35 The Tape	Episode 36 The Sweaters
Episode 37 The Internet	Episode 38 The Plan	Episode 39 The World	Episode 40 The Finale

Episode 1 The Kids	Episode 2 The Fan	Episode 3 The Coach	Episode 4 The Joy
Episode 5 The Puppy	Episode 6 The Recipe	Episode 7 The Name	Episode 8 The Extras
Episode 9 The Gripes	Episode 10 The Vacation	Episode 11 The Fraud	Episode 12 The Void
Episode 13 The Boss	Episode 14 The Move	Episode 15 The Law	Episode 16 The Allergy
Episode 17 The Mothers	Episode 18 The Password	Episode 19 The Procrastinators	Episode 20 The Shell
Episode 21 The Burden	Episode 22 The Bros	Episode 23 The Mirror	Episode 24 The Man
Episode 25 The Pizza	Episode 26 The Lie	Episode 27 The Butterfly	Episode 28 The Question
Episode 29 The Saint	Episode 30 The Friend	Episode 31 The Oracle	Episode 32 The Safety
Episode 33 The Society	Episode 34 The Spoiler	Episode 35 The Countdown	Episode 36 The Nobody
Episode 37 The Downer	Episode 38 The Egg	Episode 39 The Triangle	Episode 40 The Money

Episode 1 The Return	Episode 2 The Nemesis	Episode 3 The Crew	Episode 4 The Others
Episode 5 The Signature	Episode 6 The Check	Episode 7 The Pest	Episode 8 The Sale
Episode 9 The Gift	Episode 10 The Parking	Episode 11 The Routine	Episode 12 The Upgrade
Episode 13 The Comic	Episode 14 The Romantic	Episode 15 The Uploads	Episode 16 The Apprentice
Episode 17 The Hug	Episode 18 The Wicked	Episode 19 The Traitor	Episode 20 The Origins
Episode 21 The Origins: Part Two	Episode 22 The Girlfriend	Episode 23 The Advice	Episode 24 The Signal
Episode 25 The Parasite	Episode 26 The Love	Episode 27 The Awkwardness	Episode 28 The Nest
Episode 29 The Points	Episode 30 The Bus	Episode 31 The Night	Episode 32 The Misunderstandings
Episode 33 The Roots	Episode 34 The Blame	Episode 35 The Slap	Episode 36 The Detective
Episode 37 The Fury	Episode 38 The Compilation	Episode 39 The Scam	Episode 40 The Disaster

Episode 1 The Rerun	Episode 2 The Stories	Episode 3 The Guy	Episode 4 The Boredom
Episode 5 The Vision	Episode 6 The Choices	Episode 7 The Code	Episode 8 The Test
Episode 9 The Slide	Episode 10 The Loophole	Episode 11 The Fuss	Episode 12 The Copycats
Episode 13 The Potato	Episode 14 The Outside	Episode 15 The Vase	Episode 16 The Matchmaker
Episode 17 The Box	Episode 18 The Console	Episode 19 The Ollie	Episode 20 The Catfish
Episode 21 The Cycle	Episode 22 The Stars	Episode 23 The Grades	Episode 24 The Diet
Episode 25 The Ex	Episode 26 The Sorcerer	Episode 27 The Menu	Episode 28 The Uncle
Episode 29 The Weirdo	Episode 30 The Heist	Episode 31 The Singing	Episode 32 The Best
Episode 33 The Worst	Episode 34 The Deal	Episode 35 The Petals	Episode 36 The Nuisance
Episode 37 The Line	Episode 38 The List	Episode 39 The News	Episode 40 The Puppets

Episode 1 The Rival	Episode 2 The Lady	Episode 3 The Sucker	Episode 4 The Vegging
Episode 5 The One	Episode 6 The Father	Episode 7 The Cringe	Episode 8 The Cage
Episode 9 The Neighbor	Episode 10 The Anybody	Episode 11 The Faith	Episode 12 The Candidate
Episode 13 The Pact	Episode 14 The Shippening	Episode 15 The Brain	Episode 16 The Parents
Episode 17 The Founder	Episode 18 The Schooling	Episode 19 The Intelligence	Episode 20 The Potion
Episode 21 The Spinoffs	Episode 22 The Transformation	Episode 23 The Understanding	Episode 24 The Ad
Episode 25 The Ghouls	Episode 26 The Stink	Episode 27 The Awareness	Episode 28 The Slip
Episode 29 The Drama	Episode 30 The Buddy	Episode 31 The Possession	Episode 32 The Master
Episode 33 The Silence	Episode 34 The Future	Episode 35 The Wish	Episode 36 The Factory
Episode 37 The Agent	Episode 38 The Web	Episode 39 The Mess	Episode 40 The Heart
Episode 41 The Revolt	Episode 42 The Decisions	Episode 43 The BFFS	Episode 44 The Inquisition