The Hero/Transcript

What's Our Dad Good At...?

[Elmore Junior High playground. Teri, Masami, Banana Joe, Hector, Gumball, and Darwin are eating their lunch]

Darwin: [Sees Masami colored brown] What happened to you? You look like a Florida grandma.

Masami: This, my ignorant friend, is a suntan. My dad just took me skiing. You've probably never heard of it. It's what rich people do.

Banana Joe: My dad is rich -- in vitamin B-six and potassium. He's also a good source of fiber.

Teri: Well, my dad can beat rock.

Hector: Well, that's nothin'. My dad's so big that three mountain climbers got lost in his belly button.

[Richard pulls up in his car and comes out with a paper bag. He listens closely to the conversation]

Masami: What's your dad good at?

Gumball: Hm... what's our dad good at? He's good at being nice.

Masami: No. More like a skill.

Darwin: Is sweating without moving a skill?

[The kids laugh]

Gumball: How about...putting on weight? He's awesome at that.

[The kids laugh again]

Darwin: He must be good at something.

Gumball: I guess he's only good at being embarrassing.

[They laugh]

Gumball: Yeah, uh...like that time at the mall.

[Flashback. Elmore Mall. Several citizens are dancing to hip-hop music. Richard storms into the scene and starts dancing]

Richard: Ohh! Oh-oh-uh-ohh-ohh! Ohh! Oh-oh! Uh-ohh-ohh!

[Bystanders, including Gumball and Darwin, look on with chagrin]

Billy: Mother, I feel so sorry for this man's children.

Felicity: Oh, don't worry, honey. It's very unlikely anyone like that would have children.

[End of flashback. Gumball and Darwin laugh]

Darwin: Yeah, or the time he came to school to talk about his job.

[Flashback to Ms. Simian's classroom. Principal Brown is sitting behind the desk, cringing as Richard is dancing the same way as he was at the mall]

Richard: Ohh! Oh-oh! Uh-ohh-ohh!

[End of flashback]

Gumball: And you'd expect someone who eats that much would be way better at cooking.

Darwin: [Opens his mouth] Yeah, I chipped a tooth on one of his cupcakes.

Gumball: Ha! What's he doing, using cement instead of flour?

[They laugh. Richard appears very hurt. Two cupcakes fall out of the paper bag, crashing into the asphalt with a thud. He retreats into his car, crying]

Raw Dinner

[The Wattersons' house, dining room. Gumball and Darwin take their seats. Anais is on the opposite side of the table with a plate of cupcakes]

Gumball: Hey, Mom. What's for dinner?

[Nicole furiously slams an unopened package of raw chicken legs onto the table in front of him]

Nicole: Chicken and fries! [storms off]

Gumball: Hm... does this look a little underdone to you?

Darwin: [Picks up an unwashed potato with his fork] I think there's something wrong with my fries, too.

Gumball: Can we just skip to dessert?

[A cupcake is tossed at Gumball and Darwin. Gumball and Darwin scream as they dodge. A plate is smashed by the cupcake]

Gumball: What is wrong with you?!

Anais: [Yelling] You know very well what's wrong!

[She tosses another cupcake at them, and they dodge again]

Gumball: What's going on?! Why is dinner raw?!

Nicole: [Yelling] You know very well why dinner is raw!

Gumball: I'm just gonna try something. [Inhales deeply] We're both very sorry for what we've done.

Nicole: [Yelling] So you do know what you've done!

Gumball and Darwin: No!

Nicole: [Yelling] Then how can you apologize for something you don't even know about?!

Gumball: I don't know!

Anais: Look, Dad overheard what you said in the playground.

Gumball: Ohhh! That!

Nicole: And he's been hiding in the shed ever since!

Gumball: [Quietly] Well, at least he can't embarrass us in there.

Darwin: Incoming!

[Another cupcake flies at them, and once again they dodge]

Gumball: Look, I'd happily apologize to Dad... [Yelling] if what we said wasn't the truth!

Nicole: Right, that's it! You clearly don't appreciate your parents, so until you apologize to your father, we won't be doing anything else for you! Let's see how long you last!

Gumball: Challenge accepted!

[He grabs the the raw potato and eats half of it. Nicole and Anais are surprised]

Nicole: [Puts her hand out] I paid for that potato.

Gumball: [Spits out bits of potato onto Nicole's hand] I wasn't hungry anyway.

No Shower

[The next morning. Gumball and Darwin are standing in front of the closed bathroom door. Gumball is wearing nothing but briefs, and has a towel on his arm. Likewise, Darwin is wearing a towel. Gumball is pounding on the door]

Gumball: Anais! Come on! You've been in there forever!

[Anais peeks from behind the door]

Anais: Oh, I'm sorry. But as Mom pays the water bill and you two are insensitive brats, I think you'll need to shower somewhere else. [She closes the door]

Gumball: [Mockingly] As Mom pays the water bill, I think you should shower somewhere else.

Anais: [From behind the door] You can say what you like, but you're not going to annoy me!

Gumball: [Mockingly] You can say what you like, but you're not going-- [A soap bar flies from behind the door, hitting Gumball squarely in the face.  His nose swells up] Ugh! My...nose!

Anais: [Mockingly] Ow! My dose!

Gumball: [Growls, then chuckles] Who's the loser now? We got soap. All we need is water.

[Outside the Watterson house. The boys are on the street, in front of a puddle. They are lathering up with soap]

Darwin: Dude, I think I'm starting to regret this challenge.

Gumball: It's coming! [A truck passes by, splashing mud onto the boys] Ugh. I think I should've closed my mou-- [Another vehicle passes by, and the boys are splashed again]

Rotten Meal

[The dining room. Gumball and Darwin rush to the table with bags full of groceries]

Gumball: I can't believe we got all this stuff for a dollar! Thank you, clearance aisle.

[They dump the groceries onto the table]

Darwin: Well, you heard what Larry said. We got to eat this stuff before it goes past its expiration date.

Gumball: Oh, young Darwin, you're so gullible. Food doesn't have a sell-by date. That's what the corporations want you to think so you buy more oil and believe in moon landings, like the sheep you are. Take this banana. According to your "sell-by date," it should go bad today, but as you can see, it's absolutely fine. [Peels the banana and takes a bite of it. The banana immediately withers. He spits it out] Dude, we need to eat this food real quick.

Gumball and Darwin: Aaaah!

[Darwin runs to the kitchen with an egg carton. He cracks one egg onto the pan. A live chick flies out of it. Darwin screams and drops the carton, cracking the rest of the eggs, and more chicks appear]

Darwin: Aah! 

[Gumball dumps a bag of sunflower seeds onto his palm. The sunflowers grow from the seeds, then wilt]

Gumball: Daaah!

[Darwin returns to the dining room. He opens a package of meat. It quickly rots. Maggots suddenly appear and rapidly eat all of the meat. Swarms of flies emerge and eat most of the spoiled groceries in seconds]

Gumball and Darwin: Aaah!

[Only a unlabeled tin can is left standing on the table]

Gumball: Well, this is all we have left. Things don't go off in cans, right?

Darwin: What do you think is in it?

Gumball: Please...let it be peaches in syrup.

Darwin: I hope it's hot dogs.

Gumball: As long as it's edible, I don't care. [He opens the can, and an apparently dead rat falls onto the plate] Aw, poor little thing.

[The rat comes to life and hisses at the boys]

Gumball and Darwin: Aaah!

Gumball: Get it!

[The rat flees before Darwin bashes the plate to pieces with a frying pan]

Darwin: Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! [He cries]

Ready to Apologize

[Gumball and Darwin are on the school bus. They're filthy, starving, obviously smelly, and surrounded by flies]

Darwin: So, you ready to apologize now?

Gumball: Nope.

Rocky: [Holding his nose] Uh, boys? I'm gonna have to ask you to get off the bus.

Gumball: Why?

Rocky: 'Cause the suspension can't take it anymore.

[The rest of the students are at the rear of the bus, away from Gumball and Darwin. It itself is tipping over. The boys jump onto the street]

Gumball: Okay, I guess I'm ready now. [Scene cuts to the Wattersons' backyard] Ugh! I can't believe we're apologizing.

Darwin: I don't care. I'm not eating canned rats again.

My Little Ones

[The Watterson's backyard. Gumball and Darwin approach the shed, and peer inside. Richard is seated, hammering nails into a board on his lap. He sighs and gets up, wobbling slowly]

Gumball: I'm sorry, I know I said I would... [Laughs] I can't do this. [Continues laughing as he walks away]

[Darwin peers into the shed again. Richard picks up a framed photo. It's his younger self holding baby Gumball. He begins singing as the camera pans over a collage of photos containing younger Gumball, Darwin, and Richard in happier times, as well as drawings from the boys to Richard]

Richard: I remember when you were still little, my little ones.

I was the giant who picked you up when you fell down.

And life was just one funny riddle, my little ones.

We laughed every day as the world went around.

I was the hero who taught you how to talk.

I was the hero who taught you how to walk.

And now you're no longer so little, my little ones.

You see so much more than I ever will see.

And though I'm just Dad and not a hero, my little ones.

Being just Dad's good enough for me.

[It's now raining outside the shed. Darwin's very touched by Richard's song]

Darwin: [Sobbing] I understand everything now. No, I don't. Yes, I do! No, I don't. What'd he say, again? Little one, I was the hero who taught you to walk, I was the hero who taught you to talk--  Hero! That's it! I need to make him feel like a hero again!

A Leap of Faith

[The junkyard. It's raining heavily, and Gumball and Darwin are inside a rusty car body]

Gumball: Okay, so, where's the surprise?

Darwin: He should be here any minute.

Gumball: "He?" I thought there was gonna be a cake or something.

Darwin: The surprise is gonna be better than a cake. I'm giving you... reconciliation with your father.

Gumball: [Sighs] Oh, man. I should've known it was something lame like that. Nobody invites people to eat cake in a junkyard. Go on, tell me your plan, then.

Darwin: It's simple. We get picked up by that magnet and get dropped into that crusher.

[Gumball does a double take as thunder crashes]

Gumball: What?! Are you insane?!

Darwin: And I've called Dad to come and rescue us.

Gumball: [Does a double take again] What?! Are you insane?!

Darwin: Don't worry. I can stop it at any time with this remote.

Gumball: Ohh! I thought you were relying on Dad there for a minute. [Chuckles] All right. Let's get started.

[Darwin clicks the remote, activating the magnet crane. It lifts the car body up, and the powerful magnet draws the remote out of Darwin's fins, sticking to the roof. Gumball and Darwin attempt to pry it off the car's roof, but the magnet is too strong]

Gumball: Oh, great job! What are we gonna do now?!

Darwin: It's okay! There's Dad now! He can stop it from that control box!

[The Watterson car plows through the wire fence and crashes into the station]

Richard: I'm coming to save you!

[Richard drives into the control box, moving the crane]

Gumball: Here we go. We're doomed.

Darwin: Don't worry! Have some faith in him!

Richard: Boys! Where are you?

Darwin: Up here!

Richard: How am I supposed to get up there?!

Gumball: [Sarcastic] Oh, I don't know. How 'bout you get us down using that ladder right there?!

Richard: Oh, yeah. Okay. [He grabs the nearby ladder and tries to reach the car body, but the magnet rips it out of his hands. It sticks to the underside of the car body] Aah!

Gumball: [Sarcastic] Wow. Really thought that one through, didn't ya?

Richard: [Looks down in shame] Ohh!

Darwin: What is wrong with you?! Don't you know people have feelings? He's trying to help us!

Gumball: [Sarcastic] Well, great job he's doing so far.

Darwin: You are so insensitive! Would it really hurt you to encourage him once in a while?

Gumball: You can encourage a clam to read all you want, but that's not going to get it into college. People have limits, and Dad reached his own a long time ago.

Richard: Don't worry, kids! I have an idea!

[He pulls the switch at the control panel and the magnet powers down. The car body begins to plummet to the ground]

Gumball and Darwin: Aaaaaaaaaaaah!

Richard: Aah! Ooh!

[He pushes the switch back in on position, powering the magnet up. It immediately pulls the car body up]

Gumball and Darwin: [They smash into the car roof] Oww!

Richard: I'm sorry! [Control box explodes] Aah!

[The crane's magnet powers up even more, attracting more metal objects, forming a large pile of objects]

Richard: Aah! That's what I meant to do! [Starts climbing towards the boys]

Darwin: Great job, Mr. Dad!

Richard: Thank you! [Almost falls] Aaaah-

[Darwin gasps. A portion of the cabinet opens with notes falling. Richard whimpers]

Gumball: [Clapping sarcastically] Yeah, great job. Do you want us to save you before you save us?

[Richard begins climbing the scrap metal chain toward the boys. A lawn mower turns on, shredding Richard's clothes]

Richard: Ow!

Gumball: [Sarcastic] Saving us in style, huh?

Gumball and Darwin: Aah!

[The steel cable attached to the magnet begins to fray. Richard falls off the scrap metal chain]

Richard: Aaah!

Gumball and Darwin: Dad! No!!  [They break into tears]

Gumball: [Sobbing] He's gone. And I was laughing at him. Why didn't I tell him that, in spite of everything, I was proud, Darwin? I was proud of him! If he were still here, I would tell him! [Richard manages to climb onto the car body] If he was still here-- [Notices Richard] Oh, you're here. So, what's your plan to get us down, huh?

Richard: Uh...

Gumball: Typical.

[The cable frays more, threatening to drop the car body and its occupants. Only a single thread is left. Gumball sighs, then the cable finally gives way. They all fall, screaming. Richard is the first to land, next to an old mattress]

Richard: Ow! Ooh!

[Darwin lands in his arms]

Darwin: Aaah!

Richard: Ugh! [Pained voice] You could have tried to land on the mattress. [Normal voice] Wait a minute. Where's Gumball?

Gumball: He-e-e-lp! [He's precariously balancing himself on a ladder over the mouth of the cruncher]

Richard: Son! You can do it!

Gumball: Aaah! Aah! Aah! I can't do this!

Richard: Gumball, you have to get up!

Gumball: I-I--I-I can't!

Richard: Come on, son! [A brief flashback to a younger Richard, then back to present day Richard] You can do it!

[A brief flashback to baby Gumball, then back to present day Gumball]

Gumball: I'm coming, Dad! Don't let me down! [Runs towards Richard]

Richard: I won't! [A brief flashback of a scene of baby Gumball toddling toward younger Richard, then back to present] Jump!

[Gumball inches forward, then finally jumps toward Richard as the ladder falls away, in slow motion. Darwin passes out. Richard catches his son into his chest, and they hug tightly as they begin crying]

Gumball: Please stop crying, Dad. You'll always be my hero.

Richard: It's not that. It's just you're digging your claws into my nipples!

[Darwin recovers then sobs]

Richard: Why are you crying, buddy?

Darwin: Because I love hugs!

Richard: Come here!

[Darwin joins their group hug as they cry. Eventually, the rain stops]

Our Hero

[Inside the Watterson shed. Richard is hammering the newest drawing onto the wall. It contains crude portraits of him with Gumball and Darwin. Above the figures are the words "Our Hero." Nicole is at the shed door]

Nicole: Aw. I'm glad you guys made up. Come on. Dinner's ready. [Walks away]

[Richard starts to follow her, but discovers he's accidentally nailed his sleeve to the wall. He frowns as the screen fades to black. The episode ends]

v • e Transcript

Episode 1 The DVD	Episode 2 The Responsible	Episode 3 The Third	Episode 4 The Debt
Episode 5 The End	Episode 6 The Dress	Episode 7 The Quest	Episode 8 The Spoon
Episode 9 The Pressure	Episode 10 The Painting	Episode 11 The Laziest	Episode 12 The Ghost
Episode 13 The Mystery	Episode 14 The Prank	Episode 15 The Gi	Episode 16 The Kiss
Episode 17 The Party	Episode 18 The Refund	Episode 19 The Robot	Episode 20 The Picnic
Episode 21 The Goons	Episode 22 The Secret	Episode 23 The Sock	Episode 24 The Genius
Episode 25 The Poltergeist	Episode 26 The Mustache	Episode 27 The Date	Episode 28 The Club
Episode 29 The Wand	Episode 30 The Ape	Episode 31 The Car	Episode 32 The Curse
Episode 33 The Microwave	Episode 34 The Meddler	Episode 35 The Helmet	Episode 36 The Fight

Episode 1 The Remote	Episode 2 The Colossus	Episode 3 The Knights	Episode 4 The Fridge
Episode 5 The Flower	Episode 6 The Banana	Episode 7 The Phone	Episode 8 The Job
Episode 9 Halloween	Episode 10 The Treasure	Episode 11 The Apology	Episode 12 The Words
Episode 13 The Skull	Episode 14 The Bet	Episode 15 Christmas	Episode 16 The Watch
Episode 17 The Bumpkin	Episode 18 The Flakers	Episode 19 The Authority	Episode 20 The Virus
Episode 21 The Pony	Episode 22 The Hero	Episode 23 The Dream	Episode 24 The Sidekick
Episode 25 The Photo	Episode 26 The Tag	Episode 27 The Storm	Episode 28 The Lesson
Episode 29 The Game	Episode 30 The Limit	Episode 31 The Voice	Episode 32 The Promise
Episode 33 The Castle	Episode 34 The Boombox	Episode 35 The Tape	Episode 36 The Sweaters
Episode 37 The Internet	Episode 38 The Plan	Episode 39 The World	Episode 40 The Finale

Episode 1 The Kids	Episode 2 The Fan	Episode 3 The Coach	Episode 4 The Joy
Episode 5 The Puppy	Episode 6 The Recipe	Episode 7 The Name	Episode 8 The Extras
Episode 9 The Gripes	Episode 10 The Vacation	Episode 11 The Fraud	Episode 12 The Void
Episode 13 The Boss	Episode 14 The Move	Episode 15 The Law	Episode 16 The Allergy
Episode 17 The Mothers	Episode 18 The Password	Episode 19 The Procrastinators	Episode 20 The Shell
Episode 21 The Burden	Episode 22 The Bros	Episode 23 The Mirror	Episode 24 The Man
Episode 25 The Pizza	Episode 26 The Lie	Episode 27 The Butterfly	Episode 28 The Question
Episode 29 The Saint	Episode 30 The Friend	Episode 31 The Oracle	Episode 32 The Safety
Episode 33 The Society	Episode 34 The Spoiler	Episode 35 The Countdown	Episode 36 The Nobody
Episode 37 The Downer	Episode 38 The Egg	Episode 39 The Triangle	Episode 40 The Money

Episode 1 The Return	Episode 2 The Nemesis	Episode 3 The Crew	Episode 4 The Others
Episode 5 The Signature	Episode 6 The Check	Episode 7 The Pest	Episode 8 The Sale
Episode 9 The Gift	Episode 10 The Parking	Episode 11 The Routine	Episode 12 The Upgrade
Episode 13 The Comic	Episode 14 The Romantic	Episode 15 The Uploads	Episode 16 The Apprentice
Episode 17 The Hug	Episode 18 The Wicked	Episode 19 The Traitor	Episode 20 The Origins
Episode 21 The Origins: Part Two	Episode 22 The Girlfriend	Episode 23 The Advice	Episode 24 The Signal
Episode 25 The Parasite	Episode 26 The Love	Episode 27 The Awkwardness	Episode 28 The Nest
Episode 29 The Points	Episode 30 The Bus	Episode 31 The Night	Episode 32 The Misunderstandings
Episode 33 The Roots	Episode 34 The Blame	Episode 35 The Slap	Episode 36 The Detective
Episode 37 The Fury	Episode 38 The Compilation	Episode 39 The Scam	Episode 40 The Disaster

Episode 1 The Rerun	Episode 2 The Stories	Episode 3 The Guy	Episode 4 The Boredom
Episode 5 The Vision	Episode 6 The Choices	Episode 7 The Code	Episode 8 The Test
Episode 9 The Slide	Episode 10 The Loophole	Episode 11 The Fuss	Episode 12 The Copycats
Episode 13 The Potato	Episode 14 The Outside	Episode 15 The Vase	Episode 16 The Matchmaker
Episode 17 The Box	Episode 18 The Console	Episode 19 The Ollie	Episode 20 The Catfish
Episode 21 The Cycle	Episode 22 The Stars	Episode 23 The Grades	Episode 24 The Diet
Episode 25 The Ex	Episode 26 The Sorcerer	Episode 27 The Menu	Episode 28 The Uncle
Episode 29 The Weirdo	Episode 30 The Heist	Episode 31 The Singing	Episode 32 The Best
Episode 33 The Worst	Episode 34 The Deal	Episode 35 The Petals	Episode 36 The Nuisance
Episode 37 The Line	Episode 38 The List	Episode 39 The News	Episode 40 The Puppets

Episode 1 The Rival	Episode 2 The Lady	Episode 3 The Sucker	Episode 4 The Vegging
Episode 5 The One	Episode 6 The Father	Episode 7 The Cringe	Episode 8 The Cage
Episode 9 The Neighbor	Episode 10 The Anybody	Episode 11 The Faith	Episode 12 The Candidate
Episode 13 The Pact	Episode 14 The Shippening	Episode 15 The Brain	Episode 16 The Parents
Episode 17 The Founder	Episode 18 The Schooling	Episode 19 The Intelligence	Episode 20 The Potion
Episode 21 The Spinoffs	Episode 22 The Transformation	Episode 23 The Understanding	Episode 24 The Ad
Episode 25 The Ghouls	Episode 26 The Stink	Episode 27 The Awareness	Episode 28 The Slip
Episode 29 The Drama	Episode 30 The Buddy	Episode 31 The Possession	Episode 32 The Master
Episode 33 The Silence	Episode 34 The Future	Episode 35 The Wish	Episode 36 The Factory
Episode 37 The Agent	Episode 38 The Web	Episode 39 The Mess	Episode 40 The Heart
Episode 41 The Revolt	Episode 42 The Decisions	Episode 43 The BFFS	Episode 44 The Inquisition