The Grades/Transcript

Back to Pre-School

[The episode opens at the Elmore Junior High School. It is early in the morning, and classes have yet to start. Yawning, Principal Brown enters the teacher's lounge and flips the light switch. He screams, scattering the stack of papers he is carrying, as his fur stands on end. On the other side of the room, Miss Simian is shown displaying an unsettling grin]

Nigel Brown: Lucy, what's wrong with your face?!

Lucy Simian: I'm smiling, isn't it obvious?

Nigel Brown: No, it looks like you're trying to eat your own chin.

Lucy Simian: [Adjusts her mouth] How about this?

Nigel Brown: Uhh...

Lucy Simian: [Tries again, with frightening results] This?

Nigel Brown: [Recoils] Ugh!

Lucy Simian: Hmm. I just lack practice.

Nigel Brown: Why are you trying to smile anyway?

Lucy Simian: [Sneering] I found it.

Nigel Brown: [Panicky] Ah, let's not jump to conclusions. It could be any Principal Brown on that FBI warrant. It's a common name.

Lucy Simian: [Baffled] Hmm?

Nigel Brown: Oh, um... Listen, I'm not a furry. I just wanted to know what I'd look like with a tail.

Lucy Simian: What?! What else have you been hiding?

[The hair on the back of his head parts, revealing a pale, humanoid face]

Face: [Whispering] She knows! Finish her now before she tells all the others!

Nigel Brown: [Covers it up again] Uh, no, that's it. [Nervous] So what is it that you found, exactly?

Lucy Simian: What is the one thing that would improve the quality of life of everyone in this school by a thousand percent?

Nigel Brown: [Excited] Money?

Lucy Simian: Better.

Nigel Brown: More money?

Lucy Simian: Even better.

Nigel Brown: [Gasps] Real food in the vending machines?!

[The screen turns to an empty vending machine with sheets of paper on it that have images of food on them]

Lucy Simian: No! Even better! I was looking through Gumball Watterson's records, and he failed a test in kindergarten. His grade point average is void! [Laughs] I knew I was right to give up on him early. Let's celebrate! [Shimmies to upbeat music]

Nigel Brown: Um, what is that?

Lucy Simian: Dancing.

Nigel Brown: Hmm. Looks like you're trying to shake out a tapeworm.

Lucy Simian: Come on, join in!

Nigel Brown: [Shrugs; Wiggles his body] See, this is how you do it. Mmm-hmm. Work it.

[The school bell rings. Gumball is seated at a desk in his classroom, reading a textbook. Unbeknownst to him, the entire desk, himself included, is carried from the room and into the hallway. Upon arriving outside, he becomes aware of his surroundings just before Miss Simian dumps him face-first onto the sidewalk]

Gumball: Gah! What the what?! What did I do wrong?

Lucy Simian: [Shows him the test paper] Look at this question on the test you did seven years ago. "I go to the store and buy ten hotdogs, nine burgers, three bags of chips, and six sodas. If I eat nine hot dogs, seven burgers, three bags of chips, and drink five sodas, what do I have?" You answered, "No self-control." That was not the correct answer. Which means your GPA is one point short. Do you know what that means?

Gumball: Uh, Gumball's Peruvian antelope?

Lucy Simian: What?! No! It's grade point average, and it means you're going back to kindergarten.

[Miss Simian grins as Gumball gets shocked]

First Déjà Vu

[Nicole pulls up outside the kindergarten in her car. Apprehensive, Gumball exits the vehicle and closes the door]

Nicole: Well, have a great... second, first day at school, honey. [Drives away]

[Gumball sighs, covering his face with his hands. When he lowers them, he is greeted by unfettered chaos in the form of toddlers. In unison, they notice his presence, the all-too-brief hush that follows signaling both the beginning and end of his respite. Against a backdrop of perpetual screaming, there is little he can do save weather the onslaught. Ears and fur tugged mercilessly, forcibly fed play-doh and toilet paper, covered in glue, glitter, and even food. He suffers through it all. At the end of the nightmare, he makes it home to his family, confiding in them while they are gathered by the dinner table]

Gumball: [Traumatized] They just waddle around with their pants down, grabbing everything they see and putting it in their mouths, even if it's a part of your anatomy. They get into fights for no reason and end up crying and hugging. Then they just go on slurring unintelligible nonsense, until they pass out wherever they feel like it. They're like... They're like...British tourists.

Anais: [Irritated] All I'm hearing, is that not only do you not have homework, but while we were stuck in lessons, today you got to play with toys, took two naps, and won good-boy points whenever you made it to the bathroom on time!

Gumball: What are you trying to say?

Anais: Stop going on about how good your day was.

Gumball: [Gasps] You're right.

Anais: Thank you, finally!

Gumball: No, I mean you're right. My day was awesome! I just need to get rid of my inhibitions.

[Next day at kindergarten, Gumball is seated on the floor with several of the kids. Straining, he reaches into the side of his head and plucks out what appears to be a small piece of his brain. As he tosses it on the floor, his face adopts an innocent, child-like appearance]

Octopus Kid: Eww. What's that?

Gumball: My inhibitions.

Octopus Kid: Your what?

Gumball: Oh, allow me to explain.

[Gumball demonstrates by waving his arms, spouting gibberish, and drawing on his face with a crayon. He then removes his pants, puts them over his head, and runs into a bookshelf. The kids cheer, and begin to emulate his behavior]

Gumball: [On the children's potty] Hey dude, got some TP?

[Kayvon’s hand emerges from the next stall and sticks a roll into his mouth]

Gumball: [Muffled] Thanks.

[Next, he is by an easel and in the process of painting something]

Gumball: A little over there. Hmm. It needs more yellow. [Dabs his brush onto the "canvas"] There.

[Charlie-Ann, now multi-hued from head to toe, squeals happily. Out at the playground, Gumball slam-dunks a basketball into a net only a few feet off the ground, and celebrates with the other youngsters]

When Apes Cry

[Meanwhile, at the junior high, Miss Simian opens the door to Principal Brown's office. She finds him at his desk, weeping in front of a laptop. His fur is drenched in tears]

Lucy Simian: Nigel, what's wrong?! You look like a biscuit that's been dunked.

Nigel Brown: I've been crying.

Lucy Simian: Why?

Nigel Brown: I watched this video of an orangutan saving a baby bird from drowning.

Lucy Simian: Why?

Nigel Brown: To remind myself that apes are not just terrifying creatures that bite people's fingers off when they lose it. [Holds his arms up in self-defense]

Lucy Simian: [Suspicious] Why?

Nigel Brown: [Shakes dry, shudders] Okay, right now I'm talking to you as Nigel Brown, your kind, supportive partner. The man you've loved for years who would never hurt you, and a man you would never hurt.

Lucy Simian: [Aggressive] Go on.

Nigel Brown: [Flinches; Speaks quickly] But that man is also the school principal, and it's his duty to inform you that by putting Gumball in kindergarten, you're one student short of the school board's targets and if he's not back in your class by Friday, you're fired!

Lucy Simian: [Gently grabs hold of his hands] Hmm. I understand

Nigel Brown: Really? That's so sweet of you—

[He screams as she tightens her grip and starts gnawing on his fingers. Back at the preschool, Gumball is lying on the floor, surrounded by toddlers, during naptime]

Timmy the Frog: Gumball, why is air invisible?

Gumball: Because scientists thought it was too ugly to look at, and no one would want to breathe it in.

Octopus Kid: Gumball, where do clouds come from?

Gumball: From bird flatulence.

Polly: Gumball, where does rain come from?

Gumball: It's the moon's eyes watering from all the bird flatulence.

Lucy Simian: [Off-screen] Psst!

[Gumball sits up as Miss Simian opens the front door, then approaches her]

Gumball: Ugh, what do you want?

Lucy Simian: Shh! They'll hear.

Gumball: Meh, maybe. But as long as we use words with multiple syllables, there's no way they'll understand. [Crosses his arms; resentful] What is it anyway? You've already demoted me to kindergarten. Where next, my mom's belly?

Lucy Simian: Do you wanna get back to your old class?

Gumball: No way, I love it here! Everyone looks up to me. I mean, mainly 'cause of the height difference, but it's still a good feeling.

Lucy Simian: [Taken aback] Huh? How can you enjoy it here?

Gumball: It's a world of scheduled nap times, optional pants, and food you don't need to chew.

Lucy Simian: You just described a retirement home.

Gumball: Exactly! I get to retire without ever having a job! [Content] Ahh, I love this place.

Lucy Simian: Okay, I gotta level with ya. If you don't come back, I'm fired.

Gumball: [Gasps] As if I needed more reasons to stay here!

Lucy Simian: Huh? [Closes her eyes; Her lips pucker as she forces a whimper]

Gumball: W-What are you doing? It's weird.

Lucy Simian: I'm crying.

Gumball: [Grossed out] It looks like you're trying to lay an egg with your face. Please stop.

[Her face contorts into other unnerving expressions]

Gumball: Stop it! Okay fine, I'll come back!

Lucy Simian: Ah, thank you.

Gumball: Please! I said I'd come back!

Lucy Simian: I'm not doing anything.

Gumball: Ohh, that's your normal face, isn't it?

Teaching Cheating

[Miss Simian and Gumball travel to the school library]

Lucy Simian: The only problem is you need to pass a test in order to prove you belong in my class. So, you're gonna have to study like you've never studied before.

Gumball: Let's go!

[Rock music plays in the background while Gumball collects different textbooks]

Lyrics: Gotta think big, think deep. Pretty soon you'll make that quantum leap.

[The song ends abruptly, and he stares blankly at a grade eight math book]

Lucy Simian: So?

Gumball: What do I do? I've literally never studied before.

Lucy Simian: Are you kidding me?! All these years of teaching you? Just go to your mind palace or whatever, and try to remember how to study.

Gumball: Okay, I'll try.

[As he delves into his mind, the room around him fades to black. After a short struggle, his entire body is compressed into a small rectangular block]

Lucy Simian: Hmm. More like a mind cupboard. Okay Watterson, time to roll up your sleeves.

Gumball: [Annoyed] What, more work?

Lucy Simian: No, roll up your sleeves so I can write the answers on your arm.

Gumball: But that's cheating!

Lucy Simian: Yeah, but if you rearrange the letters in the word teaching, what do ya get?

Gumball: Uhh, eting... cha?

Lucy Simian: What? No! Cheating.

Gumball: But isn't that wrong?

Lucy Simian: Only if you get caught. Look, when I was your age, I cheated too.

Gumball: [Shocked] What the what right now?!

Lucy Simian: [Places a history book with a photo of cave paintings on the table] I scribbled the answers on the cave wall.

Gumball: Ohh, so that's what cave paintings are. Okay, what's the best way for me to cheat?

Lucy Simian: In your case? Every way.

Dishonor Student

[Gumball is sitting at a desk in a barren classroom. Principal Brown hands him an exam paper]

Nigel Brown: Right, Watterson. You have one hour. [Parks himself at the teacher's desk] Begin.

[Outside, Miss Simian climbs a ladder that she leans against the window. Her and Gumball exchange a thumbs-up]

Lucy Simian: Okay, plan A.

Gumball: Mm-hm. [Stretches his tongue to see the notes written on it] Uh... I can't read it.

Lucy Simian: Why?

Gumball: It's all backwards. I wrote it in front of a mirror.

Lucy Simian: [Groans] Okay, plan B.

Gumball: [Shuts his eyes] Oh no! It goes dark when I close my eyes.

Lucy Simian: Just pull on them!

[Yanking on his upper eyelids, he studies their interior]

Lucy Simian: [Spots Principal Brown approaching] Watch out!

[She ducks below the window as Gumball releases his eyelids, causing them to snap into place]

Nigel Brown: What is going on here? [Peers at the ink imprinted on Gumball's corneas]

Gumball: Just, uh... visualizing my answers?

Nigel Brown: Oh. I've always wondered what that would look like from the outside. Carry on.

[He returns to his desk, and Miss Simian comes back up]

Lucy Simian: Plan C then.

Gumball: Mm-hm.

[Tied to one of Gumball's teeth, is a string that leads down his throat. He tugs on it, and his lower body folds up like an accordion]

Gumball: Huh?

Lucy Simian: Pull harder!

[He does as asked, and some of his innards fly toward Principal Brown. When they splatter against the blackboard behind him, he briefly glances up from his magazine]

Nigel Brown: Hmm? [Shrugs]

Gumball: [Worried] I hope that organ wasn't a vital one.

Lucy Simian: Next plan.

Gumball: [Raises his hand] Uh, sir?

Nigel Brown: Yes?

Gumball: Can I use the bathroom?

Nigel Brown: Mm.

[Gumball leaves for a little while, then goes back to his desk]

Lucy Simian: So, did you use the notes we left in there?

Gumball: Yep.

Lucy Simian: Ah, good.

Gumball: But I have to say, I prefer two-ply paper. It's softer.

Lucy Simian: What the?! Okay, next plan. Use the water bottle.

Gumball: Oh yeah, thanks! [Guzzles the water]

Lucy Simian: I meant the label, read the label!

Gumball: "Recycle after use." Oh, of course. [Throws the bottle into the bin]

Lucy Simian: [Riled] The answers were written inside the label! What is wrong with you?! [Produces a cheat sheet] Use these!

Gumball: [Squints] I can't read that.

Lucy Simian: Don't worry, I've got this.

[Miss Simian lifts a magnifying glass up in direct sunlight, inadvertently igniting the paper]

Lucy Simian: [Yelps; Drops both items] Never mind! I'll write the answers on the window.

[She tries to fog up the glass with her breath, but it is not very effective]

Lucy Simian: Dagnabbit, it's too hot outside. [Faints; Falls off the ladder]

Nigel Brown: Watterson, you have five minutes remaining.

[Gumball gasps and Miss Simian reappears outside]

Lucy Simian: I'll just mime it. First answer, the birth of Venus.

Gumball: [Realizes that she is nude; Gags and shields his eyes] That's not really necessary! I can hear you!

Lucy Simian: Good point. Question two—

Gumball: Oh, we don't have time for this! I'm gonna do it myself! [Backs up, blindly feeling for the cord to the window shade]

Lucy Simian: What? No, you can't! You're only one IQ point away from being a vegetable!

[He lowers the blinds, then sits down again]

Lucy Simian: Question three, question three!

Gumball: [Sighs] Okay, here we go.

Passing Muster

[The exam finally over, Gumball and Miss Simian are waiting anxiously outside the classroom. Before long, Principal Brown exits the room with a stern expression]

Nigel Brown: Okay, Watterson, I've marked your test, and I've got some bad news.

[Gumball takes the test paper and gasps]

Nigel Brown: I'll see you back in eighth grade tomorrow.

Gumball: [Shows it to Miss Simian] Look!

Lucy Simian: [Surprised] You got an A-plus? But how?!

Gumball: Must've been all the time we spent going over it.

Lucy Simian: Wait, so you actually—

Gumball: Yes, I actually learned something.

Nigel Brown: And a pleasure to keep you with us too, Miss Simian.

Lucy Simian: Ah, good job, Watterson. I guess you didn't need me after all to help you chea... oose your pen for the test. [Coughs]

[Principal Brown glares at them suspiciously]

Gumball: [Nervous] Yeah, it really helped. It meant I could focus and didn't need to cheat like you did in the eighth grade.

Lucy Simian: Ah!

Nigel Brown: Hmm...

[Gumball facepalms. Cut to the next day. The school bell rings, and Gumball is once more in his old class. Working on an assignment, he looks over to his left and catches Miss Simian trying to copy from him. He covers up his paper, and she turns away, sighing unhappily. The episode ends]

v • e Transcript

Episode 1 The DVD	Episode 2 The Responsible	Episode 3 The Third	Episode 4 The Debt
Episode 5 The End	Episode 6 The Dress	Episode 7 The Quest	Episode 8 The Spoon
Episode 9 The Pressure	Episode 10 The Painting	Episode 11 The Laziest	Episode 12 The Ghost
Episode 13 The Mystery	Episode 14 The Prank	Episode 15 The Gi	Episode 16 The Kiss
Episode 17 The Party	Episode 18 The Refund	Episode 19 The Robot	Episode 20 The Picnic
Episode 21 The Goons	Episode 22 The Secret	Episode 23 The Sock	Episode 24 The Genius
Episode 25 The Poltergeist	Episode 26 The Mustache	Episode 27 The Date	Episode 28 The Club
Episode 29 The Wand	Episode 30 The Ape	Episode 31 The Car	Episode 32 The Curse
Episode 33 The Microwave	Episode 34 The Meddler	Episode 35 The Helmet	Episode 36 The Fight

Episode 1 The Remote	Episode 2 The Colossus	Episode 3 The Knights	Episode 4 The Fridge
Episode 5 The Flower	Episode 6 The Banana	Episode 7 The Phone	Episode 8 The Job
Episode 9 Halloween	Episode 10 The Treasure	Episode 11 The Apology	Episode 12 The Words
Episode 13 The Skull	Episode 14 The Bet	Episode 15 Christmas	Episode 16 The Watch
Episode 17 The Bumpkin	Episode 18 The Flakers	Episode 19 The Authority	Episode 20 The Virus
Episode 21 The Pony	Episode 22 The Hero	Episode 23 The Dream	Episode 24 The Sidekick
Episode 25 The Photo	Episode 26 The Tag	Episode 27 The Storm	Episode 28 The Lesson
Episode 29 The Game	Episode 30 The Limit	Episode 31 The Voice	Episode 32 The Promise
Episode 33 The Castle	Episode 34 The Boombox	Episode 35 The Tape	Episode 36 The Sweaters
Episode 37 The Internet	Episode 38 The Plan	Episode 39 The World	Episode 40 The Finale

Episode 1 The Kids	Episode 2 The Fan	Episode 3 The Coach	Episode 4 The Joy
Episode 5 The Puppy	Episode 6 The Recipe	Episode 7 The Name	Episode 8 The Extras
Episode 9 The Gripes	Episode 10 The Vacation	Episode 11 The Fraud	Episode 12 The Void
Episode 13 The Boss	Episode 14 The Move	Episode 15 The Law	Episode 16 The Allergy
Episode 17 The Mothers	Episode 18 The Password	Episode 19 The Procrastinators	Episode 20 The Shell
Episode 21 The Burden	Episode 22 The Bros	Episode 23 The Mirror	Episode 24 The Man
Episode 25 The Pizza	Episode 26 The Lie	Episode 27 The Butterfly	Episode 28 The Question
Episode 29 The Saint	Episode 30 The Friend	Episode 31 The Oracle	Episode 32 The Safety
Episode 33 The Society	Episode 34 The Spoiler	Episode 35 The Countdown	Episode 36 The Nobody
Episode 37 The Downer	Episode 38 The Egg	Episode 39 The Triangle	Episode 40 The Money

Episode 1 The Return	Episode 2 The Nemesis	Episode 3 The Crew	Episode 4 The Others
Episode 5 The Signature	Episode 6 The Check	Episode 7 The Pest	Episode 8 The Sale
Episode 9 The Gift	Episode 10 The Parking	Episode 11 The Routine	Episode 12 The Upgrade
Episode 13 The Comic	Episode 14 The Romantic	Episode 15 The Uploads	Episode 16 The Apprentice
Episode 17 The Hug	Episode 18 The Wicked	Episode 19 The Traitor	Episode 20 The Origins
Episode 21 The Origins: Part Two	Episode 22 The Girlfriend	Episode 23 The Advice	Episode 24 The Signal
Episode 25 The Parasite	Episode 26 The Love	Episode 27 The Awkwardness	Episode 28 The Nest
Episode 29 The Points	Episode 30 The Bus	Episode 31 The Night	Episode 32 The Misunderstandings
Episode 33 The Roots	Episode 34 The Blame	Episode 35 The Slap	Episode 36 The Detective
Episode 37 The Fury	Episode 38 The Compilation	Episode 39 The Scam	Episode 40 The Disaster

Episode 1 The Rerun	Episode 2 The Stories	Episode 3 The Guy	Episode 4 The Boredom
Episode 5 The Vision	Episode 6 The Choices	Episode 7 The Code	Episode 8 The Test
Episode 9 The Slide	Episode 10 The Loophole	Episode 11 The Fuss	Episode 12 The Copycats
Episode 13 The Potato	Episode 14 The Outside	Episode 15 The Vase	Episode 16 The Matchmaker
Episode 17 The Box	Episode 18 The Console	Episode 19 The Ollie	Episode 20 The Catfish
Episode 21 The Cycle	Episode 22 The Stars	Episode 23 The Grades	Episode 24 The Diet
Episode 25 The Ex	Episode 26 The Sorcerer	Episode 27 The Menu	Episode 28 The Uncle
Episode 29 The Weirdo	Episode 30 The Heist	Episode 31 The Singing	Episode 32 The Best
Episode 33 The Worst	Episode 34 The Deal	Episode 35 The Petals	Episode 36 The Nuisance
Episode 37 The Line	Episode 38 The List	Episode 39 The News	Episode 40 The Puppets

Episode 1 The Rival	Episode 2 The Lady	Episode 3 The Sucker	Episode 4 The Vegging
Episode 5 The One	Episode 6 The Father	Episode 7 The Cringe	Episode 8 The Cage
Episode 9 The Neighbor	Episode 10 The Anybody	Episode 11 The Faith	Episode 12 The Candidate
Episode 13 The Pact	Episode 14 The Shippening	Episode 15 The Brain	Episode 16 The Parents
Episode 17 The Founder	Episode 18 The Schooling	Episode 19 The Intelligence	Episode 20 The Potion
Episode 21 The Spinoffs	Episode 22 The Transformation	Episode 23 The Understanding	Episode 24 The Ad
Episode 25 The Ghouls	Episode 26 The Stink	Episode 27 The Awareness	Episode 28 The Slip
Episode 29 The Drama	Episode 30 The Buddy	Episode 31 The Possession	Episode 32 The Master
Episode 33 The Silence	Episode 34 The Future	Episode 35 The Wish	Episode 36 The Factory
Episode 37 The Agent	Episode 38 The Web	Episode 39 The Mess	Episode 40 The Heart
Episode 41 The Revolt	Episode 42 The Decisions	Episode 43 The BFFS	Episode 44 The Inquisition