Darwin's Decisions
- [The episode starts with Gumball and Darwin on the school bus.]
- Gumball: So dude, what do you wanna do after school? TV or go to the mall?
- Darwin: I don't know. You know how bad I am at making decisions. I haven't even decided on a signature!
- [Flashback to Miss Simian's classroom. Carmen approaches Darwin, holding a pen and a card]
- Carmen: Hey, will you sign Teri's birthday card?
- Darwin: Uh, sure!
- [He signs but is unhappy with the result, so he crosses it out and signs again. He again does not like the result]
- Darwin: Mmh, no.
- [He tears up the card, and Carmen gasps in dismay. Flashback ends]
- Gumball: Making decisions is easy. Just use your brain! I mean, what else is it doing?
- Darwin: Uhh...
- [We see Darwin's brain, frantically checking boxes on a clipboard]
- Darwin's brain: Breathe in! Breathe out! Breathe in! Breathe out! Breathe in! [Flips page] Breathe out!
- Darwin: I think it's busy.
- Gumball: Well, you can either go on like that, or you can let me make all your decisions for you!
- Darwin: Uh...
- Gumball: It's decided, then!
One Week Later
- [One week later, the brothers are on the school bus again]
- Gumball: It's going pretty well, don't you think?
- Darwin: Really?! [Shown with his head on fire; Gumball blows out the flame] You said it would be better for the environment if I chewed on sugar cubes instead of gum!
- [Flashback to a group of firefighters attempting to pry a crazed Darwin, who is chewing on sugar cubes by loudly gritting his teeth, from his desk. Some students watch frightened]
- Darwin: [through gritted teeth] I can taste sound!
- [Flashback ends]
- Gumball: What about your date with Carrie?
- Darwin: Rather than express my feelings, you said I'd seem more cool and mysterious if I answered every question with a question!
- [Flashback to Darwin and Carrie at the cinema. Darwin holds an uneaten hot dog]
- Carrie: Aren't you gonna eat that?
- Darwin: Aren't you?
- Carrie: Um, no! You know I can't eat stuff!
- Darwin: Do I?
- Carrie: Well, you should! I'm your girlfriend!
- Darwin: Are you?
- [Carrie moves the hot dog and uses it to slap Darwin's face. Flashback ends]
- Darwin: And the perfume I got Teri for her birthday? I wanted to pack it with bubble wrap, but you said...
- [Flashback to Darwin, Masami, Alan, and Bobert celebrating Teri's birthday.]
- Darwin, Masami, Alan, and Bobert: Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you...
- [Teri opens her gift from Darwin. It is a perfume bottle, packaged in paper shreds. Teri inspects the paper closely and gasps in horror]
- Darwin, Masami, Alan, and Bobert: Happy birthday, dear Te... ri...
- Teri: Uncle Brian? [Screams]
- [Flashback ends to everyone exiting the bus]
- Gumball: Well, I was only trying to help.
- Darwin: Well, I've had it with your advice, and I'm not gonna listen to you anymore!
- Gumball: Uh, dude, I suggest you get off the bus.
- Darwin: No!
- Gumball: Before the doors close.
- Darwin: [With his face smooshed between the doors] Okay, but from now on, I'm gonna get my advice from someone else!
Mentor-Seeking
- [In the cafeteria, Darwin tries to find his personal mentor]
- Darwin: [Thinking to himself] Hmm... who to choose?
- Tobias: [Walking with Masami and Carmen] Ladies, the equator called! It wants his hotness back... from me... because I'm hot... [Points to Carmen] for you.... [Points to Masami] or you.
- Masami: Tobias, you don't have enough respect for girls!
- Tobias: [Leaning on Carmen] Ha, sure I do!
- Masami: You're literally leaning on Carmen.
- [Upon realization, Tobias screams in pain and jerks his arm away. He pulls one of Carmen's spines out of his arm.]
- Darwin: [To himself] Mmm, too slimy. What about Joe?
- Banana Joe: Hey, everybody! Watch this!
- [He throws his peel into the ground and, with a running start, slides on it like a sled. He crashes into the trash can and falls in. Rocky notices his peel on the ground and throws it in. He empties the trash and replaces the trashcan liner.]
- Banana Joe: [Inside the trash bag] Ta-da...
- Darwin: [To himself] Nah, too... weird.
- Gregory: Hey! Want to check out the new milkshake place after school? You know your boy Gregory's all about his milkshakes!
- Darwin: [To himself] Who even is that guy? [Walks in the other direction] Wait!
- [Suddenly he sees the perfect mentor: Alan. Sparkles appear around him and high-pitched music plays, which turns out to be sung by Darwin]
- Darwin: Of course! Alan!
- [Alan is sitting with a group of daycare kids]
- Little Timmy: Why can't I eat chocolates instead of vegetables?
- Alan: Because, sweet child, chocolate is fun for a treat! But vegetables are the... [Shoving an eggplant up his knot] cornerstone of a healthy diet! [Panting] And are very important! And you need to [keeps shoving] make sure you eat at least five a day! [The eggplant finally goes through; chuckles] Delicious!
- Peggy: If you were talking while you were eating, then where did the—
- Darwin: Hi, Alan!
- Alan: How can I help, Darwin?
- Darwin: Alan, you seem to have it all figured out. Could you help me make the right decisions?
- Alan: Of course! I'd be delighted to!
- Peggy: [Holds out a pineapple] Isn't fruit one of your five-a-day too?
- Alan: [Chuckles nervously, pushing her away] Anyway, Darwin, let's get out there and start making some better decisions!
Alan's Influences
- [A few days later, in the hall. Darwin is walking with Carrie.]
- Carrie: It was so refreshing, you just straight-up apologized to me.
- [Alan passes by and winks at Darwin. He winks back, with a thumbs-up.]
- Carrie: Normally, you'd try some kind of harebrained scheme to win my heart back. You're definitely making better decisions.
- [They pass by Leslie and Carmen, who both smile at him]
- Carrie: And I think everyone's starting to notice—
- [The scene cuts to Principal Brown evaluating Darwin and Alan's science fair project]
- Nigel Brown: Uranus, and Neptune. Well, that's the best solar system diorama I've seen all year. Well done, Darwin. You boys remind me of myself when I was a—
- [The scene cuts to the hexagon lady with her dog, who was just saved by Darwin and Alan]
- Hexagon lady: Disgusting vile sewer rat! But little Wilfred chases anything. I'm just glad you saved him.
- Darwin: Thanks, Mrs. Lady! Alan advised me to call the relevant authorities rather than go into the drain myself! He's the real hero!
- Hexagon lady: I never said you were a hero. But still, I'm very grateful. All I can say to you is—
- [Cut to the Donut Cop arresting Sal Left Thumb]
- Donut Cop: Eat it, greaseball! [To Darwin] Son, we couldn't have done it without you.
- Darwin: Thank you, officer! Rather than trying to take on the criminal myself with an elaborate scheme and accidentally joining his gang in the process, Alan told me to just call you!
- Donut Cop: I didn't ask, but I'm sure the mayor will invite you to City Hall so you can both be—
- [Cut to Teri holding a meringue]
- Teri: Whipped... to perfection! Thank you, Darwin! This is the tastiest meringue I've ever had!
- [She hugs him, causing him to stretch like a balloon.]
- Teri: You okay? You don't seem yourself.
- Darwin: [High-pitched voice] I'm fine! [Revealed to hover slightly above the ground] In fact, I've never been better! See you later!
- [He and Alan float over to Gumball.]
- Gumball: Well, looky who's made a decision about who's going to make their decisions!
- Darwin: [High-pitched voice] Hello, Gumball! Won't you join us?
- Gumball: Really? Join Head Zeppelin and his airhead puppet?
- Darwin: What do you mean?
- Gumball: Come on, look at you! You're turning into him! [Lets out Darwin's air, sending him on the ground] And I don't even wanna know how you got inflated in the first place.
- Darwin: [Normal voice] But I'm making good decisions now!
- Gumball: No, dude! You're just doing whatever he says!
- Darwin: That's not true!
- Alan: [Whispers to Darwin] I'm making all of my own decisions.
- Darwin: I'm making all of my own decisions!
- Alan: [Whispers to Darwin] All on my own, without any help from anyone else.
- Darwin: All on my own, without— [Gasps] You're right! I'll never be my own person until I start making decisions for myself! [Runs off crying]
- Gumball: Huh. That went pretty well, don't you think?
- Alan: Uh, no! He ran off crying!
- Gumball: Well, like I always say, you gotta break them down to build 'em back up again. Then, you break 'em down again, and then, you build 'em up again! Then, down again, then up again, then it's down, down, up, up, down, up, then all the way up, and then a little bit down and then you're done!
- Alan: That sound like a cheat code for being a terrible friend. Come on. We better go find him! [Floats off]
- Gumball: Oh, you would go that way, wouldn't you? Well, I say we should go this way-
- [Gumball walks off the other way but collides with Teri. Her meringue flies into the air and splatters on them both.]
- Gumball: Ugh! [Tastes some meringue] Darn it. They are good meringues, though.
Mall Brawl
- [Darwin is at the mall]
- Darwin: Okay. I can do this. Just make a decision to do something, and stick to it!
- [Jared waves a Joyful Burger flyer in his face]
- Jared: Hey, kid! Why not go pick up a burger? It's half price with this flyer!
- Darwin: [Takes the flyer] Yes. Yes I will! There! I made a decision to do exactly... what that guy... told me. Ugh.
- [He gets in line for the burger stand and hands his flyer to Larry]
- Darwin: One burger, please.
- Larry: Sure! Which one?
- Darwin: Uhh...
- [Muriel, who is in line behind Darwin, whispers to him]
- Muriel: Get the slaw crime. It's on promotion!
- Darwin: Uh, okay. One slaw crime, I guess.
- Larry: Excellent choice, sir! Oh, one more thing— [Dramatically zooms in] would you like to go large?
- [Larry's words echo inside Darwin's head. He imagines himself falling through a void]
- Larry: Hello? Hello?
- [In reality, Darwin is just writhing on the ground with his eyes closed.]
- Larry: Hello? Kid, which is it?
- Darwin: Uhh...
- Pantsbully: Oh, c'mon, kid! Just go large!
- Gary: No! Go small!
- Harold: I say go medium!
- [Harold stamps his foot, causing Jeff to ram into Muriel.]
- Muriel: Hey, don't push!
- [She pushes Jeff back. Everyone in line falls over, causing Marvin to knock over three call boxes.]
- Fake Muriel: (unclear)
- [the phone get disconnected]
- Fake Muriel: [Confused] Hello?
- [One of them falls on Banana Barbara, who shoots out of her peel, landing in Coach's mouth, causing her to get stuck at the bottom of the escalator. Darwin watches as a huge brawl breaks loose throughout the entire mall. Gumball and Alan find him.]
- Gumball: There he is!
- Alan: He's in trouble! Quick, Darwin! Get to the exit!
- Gumball: No, Darwin, stay! Establish dominance now! The riot can smell fear!
- [A police car pulls over. The Donut Cop assesses the scene for a few frantic seconds, then padlocks the doors.]
- French Fry Cop: You're locking the doors, Chief?
- Donut Cop: Best way to deal with rioters? Seal them in, and let them get it all out of their system.
- [Back in the mall, Hank and George watch Felicity and Billy get into a tussle with the drum kit guy.]
- Hank: Hey, look! Those people down there are jostling!
- George: Kinda looks to me like they're fighting.
- Hank: I said they're jostling!
- George: Fighting!
- Hank: Jostling!
- George: Fighting!
- [He slaps Hank into Tony, who falls on Siciliana. Her cheese and a pepperoni slice get stuck on his face. He takes the pepperoni off and eats it.]
- Tony: Mm-hm! Pepperoni!
- Quattro: Why, you!
- [He punches Tony in the face, causing him to fly across the room and slam into the piping. The pipe breaks, and water starts jetting out and filling the entire room.]
- Darwin: Oh no! What do I do?
- Alan: Climb up to higher ground!
- Gumball: No, sing a song! That usually seems to wrap things up! [Singing] Wintertime is a time for bells—
- Alan: That's not even a song about the situation!
- [A boat with three sailors inside pulls up to Darwin.]
- Sailor: Get in, kid! There's room for one more!
- Sailor: We have a spare life preserver!
- Sailor: In exactly your size!
- [Banana Bob passes by, using a burning arcade game as a raft.]
- Banana Bob: No! Hop on this arcade machine! It's on fire! And, it's sinking!
- Darwin: Uhh...
- Alan: Really?! Obviously, take the one that's an actual boat!
- Gumball: But what if it gets boring on there? Get on the arcade machine, dude!
- Alan: I think it's time we do something! The water's getting higher!
- Gumball: You know what? I'm tired of all your dumb advice. Why don't you just tie a knot in it?
- [Alan looks at the pipe and has an idea]
- Alan: Of course!
- Gumball: That is not what I meant!
- [He attaches his knot to the pipe, collecting all the water. He rapidly starts inflating and sagging due to all the weight]
- Alan: There's too much water! I can't hold it all in!
- Gumball: I know! If I run into you hard enough, it'll force the water back up into the pipe!
- Alan: I'm not sure that's a good id—
- [Gumball runs into Alan but only bounces off of him, hitting the wall and passing out. Alan, who is still inflating, is about to entrap him]
- Alan: Gumball! Wake up! I can't stop!
- [Gumball wakes up and realizes his foot is stuck under Alan. Neither of them are able to move.]
- Gumball and Alan: Help! Help!
- [Darwin, still in the water, hears them shouting for help.]
- Darwin: Gumball! I've got to do something! [Notices Larry, riding the Joyful Burger stand] Larry! How do I stop the water?
- Larry: There's a crank in the basement!
- Darwin: Thanks! [Dives down]
- Larry: [Holds up burger] Wait a minute, do you want to go large or not?!
Darwin Hatches a Plan
- [Darwin swims down to the basement, but gets stuck at two diverging hallways. Meanwhile, Alan can barely hold any more water]
- Alan: Sorry, Gumball, I thought this would make things better!
- Gumball: Well, you did always have an inflated opinion of yourself. [Chuckles and grunts]
- [Back in the basement, Darwin goes left but stops]
- Darwin: Dead end.
- [He continues right and finds the main water cut off valve, which is locked. He thinks for a moment, and then sees an axe in a glass box reading "BREAK IN CASE OF EMERGENCY." Darwin smashes the entire box against the lock, eventually breaking it and going inside. He starts turning the valve, but it gets stuck. While Gumball gets completely covered by Alan, after some struggle, Darwin gets the valve to start turning, shutting off the water ]
- Alan: It... it stopped!
- Gumball: [Completely covered by Alan] Yay.
- [Darwin finds them, reaches inside Alan, and pulls out Gumball]
- Gumball: Huh, ever thought about being a vet?
- Darwin: No, a plumber! I turned off the water supply, and it was all my idea!
- Gumball: Nice work, buddy.
- Alan: But the mall is still flooded!
- Gumball: Okay, well I think we should soak it up with as much rice and dehydrated fruit as you can find.
- Alan: No! You should find a call box, and alert the relevant authorities!
- Gumball: Ugh. You would say that, you—Hey, where's Darwin?
- [Darwin swims to the bottom of the mall fountain, finds the drain, and opens it. All the water slowly drains out, making a loud noise. The noise is then revealed to have come from Leonard, slurping a soda.]
- Leonard Daniels: What?
- Darwin: I just pulled out the plug!
- Gumball: Yeah, I guess that would work too.
- Alan: But what about me?
- Gumball: Let me do this one. [Nears Alan and extends his claw]
- Alan: No, no, no, no, no—
- [All the water shoots out, breaking through the doors and drenching the two cops outside.]
- French Fry Cop: Chief, I can't feel my legs!
- Donut Cop: And I feel like I've been dunked!
Three Chocolates, Please!
- [Some time later, Gumball, Darwin, and Alan walk to the ice cream truck. Alan is completely stretched out]
- Gumball: Well, at least Darwin is making his own decisions now.
- Alan: Yeah, and I'm sure I'll be able to work off all the loose skin in no time!
- Larry: What can I get you boys?
- Gumball: Three ice creams with chocolate sauce, please.
- Darwin: Wait! Make that two chocolate, and one with strawberry.
- Larry: Oh, we're out of strawberry!
- Darwin: Whatever. Three chocolate, then.
- [The episode ends]
v • e Transcript
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| Episode 1 The DVD |
Episode 2 The Responsible |
Episode 3 The Third |
Episode 4 The Debt |
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| Episode 5 The End |
Episode 6 The Dress |
Episode 7 The Quest |
Episode 8 The Spoon |
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| Episode 9 The Pressure |
Episode 10 The Painting |
Episode 11 The Laziest |
Episode 12 The Ghost |
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| Episode 13 The Mystery |
Episode 14 The Prank |
Episode 15 The Gi |
Episode 16 The Kiss |
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| Episode 17 The Party |
Episode 18 The Refund |
Episode 19 The Robot |
Episode 20 The Picnic |
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| Episode 21 The Goons |
Episode 22 The Secret |
Episode 23 The Sock |
Episode 24 The Genius |
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| Episode 25 The Poltergeist |
Episode 26 The Mustache |
Episode 27 The Date |
Episode 28 The Club |
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| Episode 29 The Wand |
Episode 30 The Ape |
Episode 31 The Car |
Episode 32 The Curse |
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| Episode 33 The Microwave |
Episode 34 The Meddler |
Episode 35 The Helmet |
Episode 36 The Fight |
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| Episode 1 The Remote |
Episode 2 The Colossus |
Episode 3 The Knights |
Episode 4 The Fridge |
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| Episode 5 The Flower |
Episode 6 The Banana |
Episode 7 The Phone |
Episode 8 The Job |
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| Episode 9 Halloween |
Episode 10 The Treasure |
Episode 11 The Apology |
Episode 12 The Words |
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| Episode 13 The Skull |
Episode 14 The Bet |
Episode 15 Christmas |
Episode 16 The Watch |
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| Episode 17 The Bumpkin |
Episode 18 The Flakers |
Episode 19 The Authority |
Episode 20 The Virus |
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| Episode 21 The Pony |
Episode 22 The Hero |
Episode 23 The Dream |
Episode 24 The Sidekick |
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| Episode 25 The Photo |
Episode 26 The Tag |
Episode 27 The Storm |
Episode 28 The Lesson |
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| Episode 29 The Game |
Episode 30 The Limit |
Episode 31 The Voice |
Episode 32 The Promise |
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| Episode 33 The Castle |
Episode 34 The Boombox |
Episode 35 The Tape |
Episode 36 The Sweaters |
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| Episode 37 The Internet |
Episode 38 The Plan |
Episode 39 The World |
Episode 40 The Finale |
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| Episode 1 The Kids |
Episode 2 The Fan |
Episode 3 The Coach |
Episode 4 The Joy |
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| Episode 5 The Puppy |
Episode 6 The Recipe |
Episode 7 The Name |
Episode 8 The Extras |
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| Episode 9 The Gripes |
Episode 10 The Vacation |
Episode 11 The Fraud |
Episode 12 The Void |
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| Episode 13 The Boss |
Episode 14 The Move |
Episode 15 The Law |
Episode 16 The Allergy |
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| Episode 17 The Mothers |
Episode 18 The Password |
Episode 19 The Procrastinators |
Episode 20 The Shell |
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| Episode 21 The Burden |
Episode 22 The Bros |
Episode 23 The Mirror |
Episode 24 The Man |
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| Episode 25 The Pizza |
Episode 26 The Lie |
Episode 27 The Butterfly |
Episode 28 The Question |
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| Episode 29 The Saint |
Episode 30 The Friend |
Episode 31 The Oracle |
Episode 32 The Safety |
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| Episode 33 The Society |
Episode 34 The Spoiler |
Episode 35 The Countdown |
Episode 36 The Nobody |
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| Episode 37 The Downer |
Episode 38 The Egg |
Episode 39 The Triangle |
Episode 40 The Money |
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| Episode 1 The Return |
Episode 2 The Nemesis |
Episode 3 The Crew |
Episode 4 The Others |
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| Episode 5 The Signature |
Episode 6 The Check |
Episode 7 The Pest |
Episode 8 The Sale |
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| Episode 9 The Gift |
Episode 10 The Parking |
Episode 11 The Routine |
Episode 12 The Upgrade |
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| Episode 13 The Comic |
Episode 14 The Romantic |
Episode 15 The Uploads |
Episode 16 The Apprentice |
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| Episode 17 The Hug |
Episode 18 The Wicked |
Episode 19 The Traitor |
Episode 20 The Origins |
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| Episode 21 The Origins: Part Two |
Episode 22 The Girlfriend |
Episode 23 The Advice |
Episode 24 The Signal |
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| Episode 25 The Parasite |
Episode 26 The Love |
Episode 27 The Awkwardness |
Episode 28 The Nest |
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| Episode 29 The Points |
Episode 30 The Bus |
Episode 31 The Night |
Episode 32 The Misunderstandings |
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| Episode 33 The Roots |
Episode 34 The Blame |
Episode 35 The Slap |
Episode 36 The Detective |
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| Episode 37 The Fury |
Episode 38 The Compilation |
Episode 39 The Scam |
Episode 40 The Disaster |
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| Episode 1 The Rerun |
Episode 2 The Stories |
Episode 3 The Guy |
Episode 4 The Boredom |
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| Episode 5 The Vision |
Episode 6 The Choices |
Episode 7 The Code |
Episode 8 The Test |
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| Episode 9 The Slide |
Episode 10 The Loophole |
Episode 11 The Fuss |
Episode 12 The Copycats |
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| Episode 13 The Potato |
Episode 14 The Outside |
Episode 15 The Vase |
Episode 16 The Matchmaker |
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| Episode 17 The Box |
Episode 18 The Console |
Episode 19 The Ollie |
Episode 20 The Catfish |
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| Episode 21 The Cycle |
Episode 22 The Stars |
Episode 23 The Grades |
Episode 24 The Diet |
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| Episode 25 The Ex |
Episode 26 The Sorcerer |
Episode 27 The Menu |
Episode 28 The Uncle |
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| Episode 29 The Weirdo |
Episode 30 The Heist |
Episode 31 The Singing |
Episode 32 The Best |
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| Episode 33 The Worst |
Episode 34 The Deal |
Episode 35 The Petals |
Episode 36 The Nuisance |
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| Episode 37 The Line |
Episode 38 The List |
Episode 39 The News |
Episode 40 The Puppets |
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| Episode 1 The Rival |
Episode 2 The Lady |
Episode 3 The Sucker |
Episode 4 The Vegging |
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| Episode 5 The One |
Episode 6 The Father |
Episode 7 The Cringe |
Episode 8 The Cage |
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| Episode 9 The Neighbor |
Episode 10 The Anybody |
Episode 11 The Faith |
Episode 12 The Candidate |
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| Episode 13 The Pact |
Episode 14 The Shippening |
Episode 15 The Brain |
Episode 16 The Parents |
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| Episode 17 The Founder |
Episode 18 The Schooling |
Episode 19 The Intelligence |
Episode 20 The Potion |
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| Episode 21 The Spinoffs |
Episode 22 The Transformation |
Episode 23 The Understanding |
Episode 24 The Ad |
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| Episode 25 The Ghouls |
Episode 26 The Stink |
Episode 27 The Awareness |
Episode 28 The Slip |
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| Episode 29 The Drama |
Episode 30 The Buddy |
Episode 31 The Possession |
Episode 32 The Master |
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| Episode 33 The Silence |
Episode 34 The Future |
Episode 35 The Wish |
Episode 36 The Factory |
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| Episode 37 The Agent |
Episode 38 The Web |
Episode 39 The Mess |
Episode 40 The Heart |
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| Episode 41 The Revolt |
Episode 42 The Decisions |
Episode 43 The BFFS |
Episode 44 The Inquisition |