The DVD/Transcript

Troubles Begin

 * Gumball, don't forget to take that DVD back today or we'll get a fine.
 * Pffftt... Can't you do it? You're the one with the car.
 * I wasn't the one who watched Alligators on a Train seventy-two times.
 * Uppp... But, technically, you rented it with your money.
 * The money I have to go and earn to feed you kids.
 * The kids you decided to have.
 * Yep! No problem, Mom! I'll take it back!
 * Oh, very kind of you, honey. And don't forget to put on some pants. Bye-bye!
 * Darwin, have you seen that DVD anywhere I-- Darwin! What are you doing?
 * I'm using the pizza cutter.
 * That's not the pizza cutter, that's the DVD! Aw, give me that! Oh man, you really have to be careful with these things.  The slightest scratch and they're ruined...forever.
 * Uh, Gumball...?
 * Hup, hup, hup! I am fed up with your carelessness, Darwin. This disk utilizes laser technology. You have treat it with respect.
 * You're using the wrong side of the scrubby sponge.
 * No! No! What are we gonna do?!
 * Face the consequences of our actions and tell Mom?
 * Don't be silly. I've got a much better idea.
 * Don't be silly. I've got a much better idea.

Cardboard Scene

 * There. You can make anything with cardboard and no one will notice the difference.
 * Really? It looks kind of obvious.
 * Eh, you say that, but I lost my trousers three weeks ago, and still, no one's noticed.
 * Everyone's noticed that walk, though.
 * Really?
 * You look like you went to the bathroom in a spacesuit.
 * You look like you went to the bathroom in a spacesuit.

Urgent Mail

 * Dude, it's a letter from Laser Video!
 * Ah, so what? Put it with the others.
 * No, this one's red! It means urgent!
 * Red envelope or red writing?
 * Red writing on red envelope. It's really hard to read actually. It says we have to pay twenty-five dollars for the DVD!
 * Aaah! What are we gonna do?!
 * Face the consequences of our actions and tell Mom?
 * No, no, no, no, no. Just give me a little time to think.
 * Face the consequences of our actions and tell Mom?
 * No, no, no, no, no. Just give me a little time to think.

On the Streets

 * It took you two days to think of this?
 * Less complaining, more begging. How much have we got anyway?
 * Like, three dollars?
 * Great! Twenty-two more and we can pay for the DVD. Now pinch me, we get more when it looks like I'm crying.
 * The reason you guys are on the streets is to pay a DVD fine?
 * Yeah, I know, it's crazy, right? People don't understand how hard our life is.
 * Hey!
 * and : Yay! But...huh...
 * That guy stole our cash!
 * Well, Darwin, sometimes in life you have to realize that there are less fortunate people than ourselves. He needs that money more than we do.
 * WOOHOO! I WON! I spent your money on a scratch card, and now I'm a millionaire!
 * That's great! So, can we have our four dollars back?
 * Oh...uh...sorry, guys. I don't have anything in change.
 * WOOHOO! I WON! I spent your money on a scratch card, and now I'm a millionaire!
 * That's great! So, can we have our four dollars back?
 * Oh...uh...sorry, guys. I don't have anything in change.

Job Hunting

 * You have 8 new messages.
 * (on the machine): Hi, Laser Video here... Hello, it's Laser Video...  You need to bring back... You need......to bring......the film......back to the shop.  Ha ha, I knew you were trying to skip my messages!
 * Gumball, I think we need to get a job.
 * Mmm, can you cook?
 * No.
 * Can you drive?
 * No.
 * Can you speak Chinese?
 * No.
 * Can you provide inspirational leadership to a court team of 30 people covering both national/international markets?
 * Mmm, no.
 * Wait! How about this one? "Looking for a person with no skills or training to serve as a scientific subject for the cosmetics industry."
 * What does that mean?
 * It means they'll put make-up on us and see if it looks nice.
 * Kind of like modeling?
 * Yeah.
 * I'd always thought I make a good model.
 * What makes you think that?
 * High cheekbones.
 * There are bones in there? Oh ha, there are.
 * There are bones in there? Oh ha, there are.

On the Job

 * Are you boys 18?
 * Uhh...does it count that I've been both 8 and 10?
 * I suppose so. Now step into the make-up booth.
 * Please relax. Look at the red dot, and pout.
 * Hey, that's not bad. Looking good. What happened to you?!
 * I think I'm allergic. How come you look so good?
 * I don't know. Maybe it's something to do with my perfect skin.
 * I think I'm gonna get this off. What happened? Why am I looking at the floor?
 * Okay boys. How did the test go---?
 * I think I'm gonna get this off. What happened? Why am I looking at the floor?
 * Okay boys. How did the test go---?

Mom Senses Tingling

 * I can't believe she only gave us five bucks. It costs more than that to get home on the bus. Huh? Oh, man! More letters from Laser Video! Oh, we're in so much trouble! We have to hide these before Mom gets home!  Yes?
 * Honey, are you in trouble? Because my mother senses are tingling. I can smell trouble.
 * Trouble? No, we're fine. Absolutely no trouble here, bye.
 * Are you lying?
 * No, of course not.
 * Right, you're lying. I'm coming home now.
 * Mom's on her way home. Now.
 * What should we do?! Should we tell the truth and face the consequences of our actions?!
 * What is it with you with trying to be honest all the time?! No, we need to copy Alligators on a Train. I know. I'm gonna download it.
 * GUMBALL! You wouldn't steal a car, you wouldn't steal a woman's purse, you wouldn't steal a cell phone! PIRACY IS STEALING!
 * I know. I'm-- I'm so sorry.
 * Anyway, I got a better idea.
 * Is it stupid, desperate and very unlikely to get us out of this mess?
 * Yes.
 * Is it humiliating?
 * If we get it wrong.
 * Are we likely to get it wrong?
 * Possibly.
 * In the time it's taking me to ask these questions, could you have just told me what it is?
 * Technically.
 * Can we get on with it then?
 * Yeah, we better.
 * Yeah, we better.

Chase Scene

 * I knew it. You are in so much TROUBLE!
 * We need to get to Laser Video before Mom kicks our butt!
 * What did you do this time?!
 * STOP! RIGHT! THERE!
 * QUICK!
 * WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING!?! DON'T YOU DARE RUN AWAY FROM YOUR MOTHER!
 * UGH!
 * and : Whoa.
 * and : Aah!
 * Mom, are you okay?
 * You're in so much trouble.
 * What was that?
 * YOU'RE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE!
 * QUICK!
 * Gumball, we have to help Mom!
 * I don't know. Maybe she'll be okay.
 * GUMBALL! There's a monstrous creature attacking our mother! We have to face the consequences of our actions and HELP HER OUT!
 * Yes. I'm-- I'm sorry. You're right. Wait a minute. Why has it gone quiet?
 * and : AAAAAAAAHHHH!
 * STOP RIGHT NOW!
 * AAH!
 * QUICK!
 * Gumball, we have to help Mom!
 * I don't know. Maybe she'll be okay.
 * GUMBALL! There's a monstrous creature attacking our mother! We have to face the consequences of our actions and HELP HER OUT!
 * Yes. I'm-- I'm sorry. You're right. Wait a minute. Why has it gone quiet?
 * and : AAAAAAAAHHHH!
 * STOP RIGHT NOW!
 * AAH!
 * STOP RIGHT NOW!
 * AAH!
 * AAH!

Sometimes You Just Have To Run

 * Stop the letters! Stop the letters!
 * Huh. The Wattersons, it's about time you showed up. I assume you have my money?
 * Better than that, Larry, we got the DVD.
 * I hope you don't mind if I make sure it's real. Last time, it was a piece of cardboard.
 * Huh. Go for it.
 * Alligators on a Train. OH, NO! This alligator is on this train!  Thank goodness we got all the alligators off this train.
 * Thank you so much for saving us from all the alligators on this train.
 * Doo-doo-doo. Alligators off this train. Alligators off this train.  Alligators on a Train!
 * This had better be a joke.
 * Aw, man. What gave it away?
 * Dude, it's five seconds long and every name in the credits is one of you two.
 * I told you we should've put some other people on the credits.
 * What, and let them have all the glory?
 * Well, there's no way I can accept this. You need to give me the real DVD, NOW!
 * and : We can't! We used it to cut a pizza, and then we scratched it with the wrong side of the scrubby sponge, and then we threw it in the waste disposal! Please don't tell our mom!
 * I already know. How much is the DVD, Larry?
 * Twenty-five dollars.
 * WHAT!?! You made me leave work and chase you through the neighborhood on a dog for twenty-five dollars?!
 * But... but we were scared to tell you.
 * Aw silly, there's nothing you can do that will ever stop me loving you. Come here. Now, let me pay for that.
 * See Darwin, you should ALWAYS tell the truth and face the consequences of your actions. OW!
 * Come on, let's go home, you little troublemakers.
 * Uh, just a minute, there's also the lateness fee.
 * Oh, yes of course. How much is it please?
 * Let me see. Three months and three days late. That will be seven-hundred dollars.
 * You see boys, sometimes in life you really have to face the consequences of your actions. And sometimes you just RUN!
 * Hey, hey, HEY!
 * Oh, yes of course. How much is it please?
 * Let me see. Three months and three days late. That will be seven-hundred dollars.
 * You see boys, sometimes in life you really have to face the consequences of your actions. And sometimes you just RUN!
 * Hey, hey, HEY!